How Can You Help a Widow Who Faces Empty Chairs?

 

Even when a widow accepts invitations to join family and friends at their table, she faces empty chairs at her table and elsewhere. The Bible teaches us to care for widows. In addition to visits, invitations, and offers to assist with various tasks, I want to share another way we can help.

In Marilyn Nutter’s BRAND NEW book, Hope for Widows, she provides comfort, encouragement, journal prompts, and practical suggestions for her fellow widows. She shares her grief with candor and tells readers how God’s faithfulness buoys her on challenging days. What a wonderful gift or recommendation to share with widowed friends or family members.

A New Year’s Gift for You

Today I welcome my dear friend and author Marilyn Nutter who shares a sample devotion from her recently-released book, Hope for Widows: Reflections on Mourning, Living, and Change, published by Our Daily Bread Publishing. After you read the devotion, meet Marilyn in the bio below and find a link for her book.

Sample Devotion:

Dinner Invitation and an Empty Chair

All my longings lie open before you, Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you.

PSALM 38:9 NIV

Has it happened yet? You’re invited to dinner at a friend’s home and couples are seated around the table. You’re the odd number. Years later, I vividly remember my first experience as if it were yesterday. As if being solo in a couples world isn’t bad enough, being seated at a table next to an empty chair is downright painful. Why couldn’t someone sit next to me? I thought. I tried to ignore the empty chair, but how do you do that when you need to stretch to pass the vegetables around the table?

I ate a meal, though I can’t remember the menu. We talked, but I don’t recall the conversation. I do remember the empty chair. When I returned home, I sighed. “Glad that’s over,” I muttered, thinking about the empty chair. As I got ready for bed, I evaluated the experience. My friends were loving and kind; it wasn’t being a single with couples that bothered me as much as being placed next to an empty chair. The emptiness was glaring—literally and figuratively.

Laying my head on my pillow, I was thankful I’d gotten through it, like so many other firsts on my grief path. The experience prepared me for the next time, because there were going to be many “next times.”

God’s grace met me then. It promises to meet me each time; and with each meeting, there will be less pain—even when I sit next to an empty chair.

Treasured Reflections: How was your first experience at a couples dinner or event? Did you see the treasures of experience and grace get you through?

Treasured Thoughts: Journal your thoughts about the part experiences play in your grief journey, especially how you’ve changed from first-time experiences to now. Do you see fewer stings of hurt and more moments of grace, growth, and patience? Psalm 147:3 says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” It’s an ongoing process, not an overnight experience. How do you see that verse becoming real for you?

Taken from: Hope for Widows: Reflections on Mourning, Living, and Change © 2024 by Marilyn Nutter All rights reserved.

Published in association with Books & Such Literary Management, www.booksandsuch.com.

Requests for permission to quote from this book should be directed to: Permissions Department, Our Daily Bread Publishing, PO Box 3566, Grand Rapids, MI 49501, or contact us by email at permissionsdept@odb.org.

Here’s the Amazon link: https://tinyurl.com/2mu5becz .

About the Book

Hope for Widows: Reflections on Mourning, Living, and Change offers women connections in their grief, guiding them to see hope, grace, and comradery on an unfamiliar path. With personal reflections, questions, and expressions of gratitude, widows will join Marilyn Nutter in recognizing God’s faithful presence in details and unusual places. The 65 vignettes apply Scripture and relevant quotes to grief and mourning and look with transparency at how widowhood dramatically changes a woman’s life. The book not only ministers to widows, but offers insights to their friends and family showing the life changes and challenges a woman faces on a new path.

About the Author

Marilyn Nutter writes, not as a professional counselor or through research about grief, but as one who walks that unwelcomed, personal experience and has found God faithful in every step. In her journey, she continues to experience the grace of God-sent treasures in puzzling and new circumstances and desires to encourage others. She is a contributor to compilations, author of devotional books and co-author with April White of Destination Hope: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart. Visit marilynnutter.com  where you will find encouragement to weave hope and purpose in your life stories.

A Quote from Hope for Widows

I know I’ll never be over my loss, but I know I will continue to get through it and find life again, as will you.

–Marilyn Nutter, Author of Hope for Widows


I know I'll never be over my loss, but I know I will continue to get through it and find life again, as will you.
--Marilyn Nutter, Author of Hope for Widows
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A message from Leigh DeLozier, a mutual friend of mine and Marilyn’s:

Whether she’s your mom, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, friend, friend of a friend, or neighbor – almost everyone knows someone who is widowed. Show her you care by sharing “Hope for Widows: Reflections on Mourning, Living, and Change” by Marilyn Nutter.

–Lee DeLozier

Here’s the Amazon linkhttps://tinyurl.com/2mu5becz .

Your Turn

Share your thoughts on widowhood from a personal perspective or from helping friends. How do you think this book might help someone you know? How did the sample devotion help you? Marilyn will appreciate your responses.

Graduates: Practical Gifts of Influence, Inspiration, and Legacy-a guest post by Marilyn Nutter

Marilyn Nutter, Author MarilynNutter.com

 Welcome to Marilyn Nutter, my friend and today’s guest blogger. I know you’ll gain valuable ideas for blessing the graduate and others in your life with her ideas for practical gifts of influence, inspiration, and legacy.

Marilyn co-authored Destination Hope: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart with April White. This book offers hope in the life alterations and detours we all face. It’s a book I’ll read again and again.

Marilyn’s complete bio and a book link are below the post. You’ll love her website.                      

Graduates: Practical Gifts of Influence, Inspiration, and Legacy

I’ve witnessed graduations from kindergarten to college, and participated in hundreds of  ceremonies as a faculty member. While waiting for the commencement ceremony to begin, I reflect on my association with my students, flip through the program, and see names, now with a degree, remembering where they sat in my class. I look for those who received awards and check the program for speakers and singers. The sound of the entrance music, “Pomp and Circumstance,” always gave me a chill and sometimes, a tear. After the ceremony, students invited me to take pictures with them and we needed no prompt to smile.

My husband and I taught in a Christian university and college for over twenty-five years and were privileged to share in our students’ academic, social, and spiritual lives. One of the joys of social media is connecting with many students years later, and having a front row seat to their lives now—careers, family, ministry. I am often overwhelmed at how they reflect God’s purposes for them and their faithfulness to Him.

Today’s students face different struggles than twenty years ago. Headline news and personal experience speak for themselves. How can we bless today’s graduates as they face new challenges and changes? We may live miles from them and perhaps not able to stay connected in next weeks and months as they venture out into new and unfamiliar places–career, school, and new relationships.

Whether your graduate heads off to work, college, or graduate school, or you want to implement these ideas for your student now, may I suggest ways to invest?

Prayer

Pray Scripture specifically. Find verses that are individually meaningful—trusting God, peer pressure, decisions, spiritual walk. Fill their name in Bible verses.

“I pray ‘God is able to make all grace abound to ________, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, _____ may have an abundance for every good deed.'” (2 Corinthians 9:8 NIV)

Source: 2 Corinthians 9:8 NIV

Journal

If you have a child or grandchild heading off to college, begin a journal and include your thoughts and prayers for them. I began a journal for each of my grands when they were born. I share Scripture, experiences I had with them, and prayers. I plan to give it to them on their 21st birthday.

Text

Without being a nuisance (and not expecting a reply), send a text, forward an inspiring quote, Bible verse, or share a humorous meme. Laughter is good medicine and may be exactly what they need today. Copy and paste social media memes to send. You can subscribe to daily Bible verses, receive them on your phone, and forward them to your child and grandchild.

Source: Proverbs 17:22 ESV

Bible 

Buy a new Bible and write notes in the margins, circle phrases, and star passages with Scriptures that are important to you. Give the Bible to them when they start their new adventure. Who knows what they will find for any day when they flip through it?

One generation commends your works to another; they tell of your mighty acts.

Psalm 145:4 NIV

  Source: Psalm 145:4 NIV

Devotional book

Today’s generation reads online, but a good devotional book is priceless and may be valued in years to come. Is there one that uniquely fits your graduate in style, depth, and topics?

Though we’d love to hang on tightly and hold hands as we did that first day of kindergarten, we need to let go. From a distance—whatever separates us from our child, grandchild, or a student in our church–we reach heaven when our prayers and Scripture touch them. We can influence and inspire, and at the same time leave a legacy of what, in our hearts, has eternal value.

Which of Marilyn’s ideas would you select for blessing a graduate? Marilyn and I will be honored to pray for graduates you list in comments.

From a distance—whatever separates us from our child, grandchild, or a student in our church--we reach heaven when our prayers and Scripture touch them. Share on X
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Marilyn Nutter, Author

Marilyn Nutter is a contributor to compilations, online sites, and print publications. Her book Destination Hope: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart, written with April White, offers hope in life alterations and detours. She is a facilitator for grief groups, a speaker, and a Bible study leader. Her family of eight grandchildren fills her cup to overflowing. In her life’s seasons, she clings to Lam. 3:22-23. Visit her website at MarilynNutter.com where you’ll find words to give you hope and purpose and an opportunity to download prayers for graduates.

Destination Hope by Marilyn Nutter and April White

I highly recommend this book: Destination Hope: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart

Marilyn’s inspirational website: Marilyn Nutter’s website

Embrace Hope When Life is Hard

Who needs hope? Are you raising your hand? I am. We need hope for today, tomorrow, and the future. For small things and large things. For common dreams and secret dreams. For “normal” days and hard days.

Why do you need hope? Fill in the blank: I need hope because _____________.

May I share a hope-filled treasure with you?

DESTINATION HOPE: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart, authored by Marilyn Nutter and April White, offers authentic and riveting stories of women who found hope during unexpected trials and changes.

DESTINATION HOPE: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart, by Marilyn Nutter and April White, offers authentic and riveting stories of women who found hope during unexpected trials and changes. Share on X

The authors’ honest words about tough times offer a life preserver in a turbulent sea. April wrote this positive spin: “Trials and detours are an invitation to a front-row seat to God’s faithfulness.” In one chapter, Marilyn confesses, “Loss, like baggage in the overhead bin, is never far from reach.” Then she leads us to a truth about God: “He keeps His promises and never lets go.”

I’d only recommend a book on hope if it pointed to real hope—the hope we have in Christ.

And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you.

Psalm 39:7 ESV

As a member of the book launch team, I’m reading an advance copy. I’m highlighting and making notes in the margin because I know I’ll refer to this book again and again.

I encourage you to order a copy for yourself and your friends, so you’ll have this “Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart.” I’ll give this amazing book a 5-star rating in my reviews. But don’t take my word for it. Read below to discover what’s in store and why the authors chose this topic.  

DESTINATION HOPE: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart

by Marilyn Nutter and April White

The hit that knocked you down is the one you didn’t see coming, but it doesn’t have to keep you there.

Hope–we all want hope!

Destination Hope is a beacon of light to those who stumble along the tearful trail of uncertainty and unexpected change.

Authors of Destination Hope: A Travel Companion When Life Falls Apart Marilyn Nutter and April Dawn White

Marilyn Nutter and April White, from two different states and representing two generations have been knocked off course by challenging life changes. A dormant gene surfaced in mid-life and took April into the journey of chronic illness. Marilyn was blindsided by sudden widowhood two days before Christmas while visiting family 2,000 miles from home. 

Although April retired her pharmacist’s lab coat to the back of the closet, and Marilyn’s wedding ring was placed in a jewelry box, each found purpose and hope in new path marked with significant changes. Together they offer readers encouragement in unwelcomed life interruptions. April and Marilyn weave their personal stories along with narratives of other women knocked off course by events you may relate to–a prodigal, incarceration, death of a child, illness, widowhood, bankruptcy, special needs children, and other life challenges.

Destination Hope is arranged into six chapters called “Milepost Markers” that address losses, disappointments, or obstacles. Each entry concludes with a “Rest Area” for personal reflection, response to action, and/or opportunity to journal. A “Postcard” with a quote related to the topic sends readers off with encouragement, as they travel toward their destination of hope. An Appendix includes resources unique to various losses to guide readers in their travel plans.

It’s a tough topic many live out in real time, and Destination Hope offers camaraderie, reality, and insight for women who say, “I didn’t see this coming.” Destination Hope invites readers to link arms in friendship with April and Marilyn who have traveled a road they didn’t see ahead. Readers will discover in practical and personal ways, they can thrive, not merely survive. Hope can be their destination.

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Destination Hope is available in print and Kindle format on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Christianbook.com.

Destination Hope on Amazon

Destination Hope at Barnes and Noble

Destination Hope on ChristianBook.com

You can learn more about the authors here:

http://marilynnutter.com/    https://aprildawnwhite.com/

Please tell us in Comments what hope means to you.